I always have to remind myself that “this” is my life now. That this is the place I should be calling home. That I’ll probably be here till I’m 90; and I’m not in some sort of vacation that’s why it is important for me to get back to my senses… I owe myself that decision to be mentally present; because if I continue to stay 7000 miles away internally, I can never find happiness. I can never live this opportunity to the fullest. There are nights when I would lay awake and wonder why I’m here. Why I’m one of those people who suddenly have to go away… And leave all the things and (people… Especially) I learned to love. I keep wondering about the plans God has for me, and why do they have to take place in a part of the world I wasn’t born in. Mama told me that even before I was born, they already have the papers moving; but back then, the process was too slow that it felt surreal to plan a life away from where you were growing up. Certainly, all my visions as a kid were patterned to Manila; and now I have to change everything drastically. I’m not complaining though (not anymore)… I think I’m getting used to this part of the world, day by day. It’s just overwhelming sometimes.